match.com.py ?

There was a time when I wrote personals to put on the Internet, and met boys and even went on dates once in a while. Was thinking tonight about what my ad would say now…

Bored 30-something likes to cook, well, bake, really, and play minesweeper. Enjoys sitting in the shade, predicting the weather, long walks on the dirt roads, identifying varieties of animal feces in the street, candlelight everything when the lights go out. Very skilled at text messaging in English, sweating, repetitious conversations, making toys out of toilet paper rolls, praying for rain so I won’t feel guilty staying in all day, teaching teachers how to play bingo and explaining that life in the US is not exactly like the latest American Pie movie. Am apparently entertaining to watch, and hysterical when I try to talk in Guarani.

Location: my street doesn’t have a name, but it’s the house made of wood in front of the butchers’. Body type: gordita, pero soy mas flaca ahora. Attitude: sometimes idealistic, sometimes cynical, depending on the hour. Best way to contact me: sometimes at night I have cell phone signal in my house, so you could try to call but you probably won’t get through. Otherwise I stand in the street several times daily to check my text messages, so give that a try. Don’t be surprised if the message gets to me a day or so late though. Or just take the bus to Tacuati and ask for the Americana. I might marry you then and there.